My Comfort in Cancer’s Path

In serious illness, even cancer, there is a gift that never expires. I found this gift in my experience with malignant melanoma.

I had spent years in the sun, swimming, biking, running, and training for triathlons. Unfortunately, I never used sunscreen. A small brown spot on my face began to grow into a two-toned, asymmetrical shape with an irregular border—four of the five warning signs of skin cancer. I finally found myself in a surgeon’s office hearing the words, “malignant melanoma.”

Dr. Tabaie told me he would perform the surgery in his office, cutting a wide berth around the damaged skin. If results showed any cancer in surrounding tissue, he’d have to make an incision down to my jaw to see if it had spread to the lymph nodes. This more serious surgery would require hospitalization.

Somehow, I found myself telling Dr. Tabaie that I knew my days were in God’s hands. Whatever was meant to be, God would be with me. Dr. Tabaie said he admired my faith and hoped the results would be good.

As I walked through the parking garage, suddenly it started to sink in. What would my husband and daughter do without me? What if I couldn’t be there for her wedding? The birth of her first child? My mother had died of uterine cancer. Was I next? I almost lost it there in the garage. No, I told myself, we’re not doing this. God will give me strength.

On the way home, I stopped at Michaels for some craft items. Walking past other customers, I wanted to stop them and say, “I have cancer. Cancer!”  But something inside me said, Maybe some of them have cancer too.

When I got home, my husband Kelvin hugged me tightly and told me we’d get through this. As pastor, he set about enlisting support from our church and district prayer chains. 

I didn’t really know much about melanoma. I discovered online that it’s the least common of skin cancers, but the deadliest because of a high probability of recurrence. Mine probably resulted from those years in the sun with no sunscreen. Once I even fried my face so badly that I developed sun poisoning. How foolish I’d been. Now I knew this was serious! It seemed strange that, with something so deadly growing on my face, I felt no pain, nothing.

At church that Sunday, friends gathered around while Kelvin anointed me with oil and prayed. Later, a student from the adult class I taught came up to me, with tears in his eyes. “I’m worried about you,” he admitted. His mother had died of cancer a few years earlier. He didn’t want to lose his Sunday school teacher too. I told him that I pictured myself walking a tightrope over a gorge of fire. But I was confident that God loved me and had a plan for my life.

The day before my surgery, several women at work expressed their concern and good wishes. Most of them weren’t Christ followers. I knew this was an opportunity for them to see faith in action. I told them I was in God’s hands, and He would take care of me. Inside, I was thinking of the prayers of many friends, lifting me up to the throne of God’s grace.

On the day of my surgery, I felt peace, as if I were riding on the force of those prayers. I knew God was with me either way. Even if the cancer had already spread, then God would get me through to my life’s end.

The surgery was a bit traumatic for me. But Kelvin’s presence comforted me, even though he was out of visual range. I couldn’t see God either, but I knew He was there also. I told Dr. Tabaie afterwards that there were people praying for him as well.

Then the results came in: the melanoma had been removed before it could spread to the surrounding cells! Thanks be to God! I thanked Dr. Tabaie and told him God had used him to help me. I thought to myself, How could I share my faith with a cancer doctor if I hadn’t had cancer myself?

I knew this wasn’t just about me. Many people had been walking this tightrope with me. My friends had held me up with prayer and faith in God. He spared me for a reason.

I realized that the peace I felt was from God alone. His presence was a comfort to me. Further, I knew that, because I was trusting in Christ’s death on the cross for me, my sins were forgiven, and I would go to heaven when my time came. No matter what, I had the hope of heaven. At this writing, still cancer free, I invite you to join me on the path that leads to God’s gift of PEACE.